Remember when the internet was a way for you to interact with others from all around the world, expand your mind and keep you in contact with your friends? Yea, neither do I.
Both my interest in and tolerance for “social” media are starting to plummet. Why? Because it’s not very social. The aspect of social media I’m most quickly losing interest in is Facebook. I’ve figured out that everyone I’m Fake Facebook Friends (FFF) with falls into one of four categories.
1. People I interact with via Facebook on a somewhat regular basis.
2. People I never interact with on Facebook and if I attempt to contact them via Facebook I’m ignored.
3. People who’s entire Facebook activity consists of political and/or religious postings.
4. People who’s entire Facebook activity consists of them advertising their business or constantly posting “I just wrote a blog post. Come read it!!!!!!!!!”
I can deal with the fact that there are four kinds of people on Facebook. What makes me almost vomit every time I log on to Facebook is that most of my FFF are in groups 2, 3 and 4.
I’m gonna bitch about this much much more in upcoming posts, but here are a few observations to piss people off.
If all your conversations in real life are about politics and religion that might be why you have no friends. On Facebook I’m not any more interested in your stupid ideas than I am in person. I know one person who can’t shut the fuck up about being a vegan. Another who can’t shut the fuck up about global warming. And a bunch who can’t shut the fuck up about Obama. Do any of you notice how I don’t associate with you in person unless I get stuck in a small room with you? Why the fuck do I wanna hear that shit on Facebook?
You wrote a blog post? No shit? A blog post? All by yourself? Fucking alert the media! I’m rushing over to your website right away. Let me fucking drop everything I’m doing to expose myself to your fucking idiot based opinion about something I probably don’t give a fuck about.
You “like” your own posts on Facebook. Do you masturbate in public as well? Stop with the self-stimulation already.
I’ve discovered that I have almost no interest in using social media to advertise my business services, and I sure as fuck have no desire to use Facebook to view your advertisements. If I want to expose myself to advertisements I’ll get cable TV or turn on the radio. I want to use social media to be social. So if I send you a message on Facebook and you still haven’t responded 2 months later don’t expect me to act like I know you next time I see you in person.